It Can Make A Grown Man Cry

So, it's time to get back to this thing called blogging. I've thought of it often, just haven't done it. I got yelled at the other day for not being on here so I guess I needed that verbal abuse to get my ass in gear. Thanks CC.

Last weekend (June 6th) was the San Diego Marathon that I participated in with TNT again. It was an awesome weekend and fun season as a whole. I'm currently going through my post-season depression with it all being over and I won't see everyone again so I'll write more about that when I have those feelings under control. The race itself, well, lets just say it's one to forget.

Everything started out smoothly and as expected. To be honest, I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but more of a hope that it would go smoothly. For a majority of the training season I was battling shin issues so I wasn't able to get the proper amount of miles in. I did a couple of long runs - 17 and one 20 miler - so I at least knew I was going to be able to finish. Just how long exactly and in what condition were very much in the gray area. I started with a teammate I was hoping to pace to a 4:30-4:40 finish time. It was her first marathon and she was hoping for anything under 5 hours, but more towards 4:40. If everything went well I thought she would have a 4:30 in her. As mentioned, everything started fine and we were holding pretty close to 10 minute miles through the first half.

Then came the 2nd half. Why couldn't we just stop halfway through and say "Okay, just double that time and we'll call it good"? About mile 17 my stomach thought it would be a good idea to start revolting. Who knew running a marathon was more about using just your legs and lungs?! The more I ran, the more I thought I was going to hurl so I thought, "hey, now might be a good time to walk for a bit and get my stomach to settle down" so I started walking. Immediately upon slowing, my head thought that since my stomach didn't want to play along then it didn't have to either and got light-headed. Well that's a fine how-do-you-do! I can't run because I'm going to throw up, I can't walk because I get light-headed and I can't stop moving forward because that doesn't get me any closer to the finish line! Needless to say, at some point I told my running partner that I was struggling and for her to take off and do it without me. Sorry Mandy. I chose the lesser of the two evils and ended up walking the majority of those last 9 miles and ran sporadically when I felt up to it (which wasn't much). Long story short, I did end up finishing, but it's been my slowest time out of the 11 marathons I've done and the first one that's been over 5 hours, 5:12 to be exact. Not too happy with that. Sitting in the tent at the Finish area I'll admit to succumbing to my emotions a little and there may have been a tear or two. I'll blame it on the whole body being tired and not knowing what to do. I'm a guy and we're not supposed to cry, right? It took me awhile to come to grips with the whole run and I've accepted it (still not happy with it though). I'll just have to make sure it doesn't happen again. I'll have at least 43 more attempts at this damn distance (42 more states and D.C.)!

To end on a positive note, Mandy did awesome and beat her 5 hour goal! And hers were tears of joy.

So Long, Farewell...

This is it. My last post from Lonsdale. I'm sitting in my empty house with only my computer and some miscellaneous boxes of toys and crap for a garage sale. I moved out last weekend and am just finishing up cleaning and hauling out the last few remainders. Tomorrow I'm having the phones turned off so no sense in keeping the laptop here (yup, I was on dial-up while living down here in BFE!).

Moving has proved to be more emotional than I thought it would be. While packing a couple of weeks ago and looking at the bare walls it hit me that I was moving out of my "home" and into another "house". There is a difference. I got sad. I'm getting sad again now just typing it.

On the other hand though, this past week has been nice being in the cities (I moved to Richfield) and only 5 miles from work with an 11 minute commute. This past week I've already done a couple of things I haven't been able to do for the past 10 years down here in Lonsdale; small, insignificant things you don't normally think of if you get to do them all the time - I got to go home for lunch and I got to go home in-between leaving work in the evenings and my group training runs with TNT. I smiled when I did those things.

The boys don't know we've moved yet. They knew it was happening soon, but didn't know when. They've been on vacation with their mom the past 10 days so I took advantage of that time and got it done. I'm anticipating them not liking this fact, but I think they'll come around after a couple of days. We'll find out tomorrow anyway. That'll give them the weekend to adjust. Could be interesting so stay tuned.

There might be something in the works for #3, stay tuned for that as well. ;)

Adios from Lonsdale. It's been what it's been.

How Prophetic

The day after I post my resolutions I get hit square in the face with needing to make sure I follow through on one, #2. I had a doctor's appointment and in their routine they make each patient jump on the scale on the way to the private room. I knew I wasn't going to like this number, but I wasn't ready for what it read. I can now officially say I weigh more than I ever have in my lifetime. Not a proud moment. I knew I was slacking off these past 4 months, but I guess I didn't realize to what extent until the last day of the year. These next couple of weeks are going to be crucial in getting back down to where I want and need to be. Want, because I feel like a slug right now and it's not a good feeling. Need, because I know it can't be healthy for me to be up this high. If I can get past the disappoint of where I've let myself get to and into the positive realm and start to see some result, it would make things easier from there on out! There are some family genetics working against me so I can't help the bad guys out by letting my shape get away from me. The more in shape I can maintain, the more at bay I can keep those genes.
It's all good though, this negative realization has helped me focus on another resolution as well, #4. I got a little more serious about picking out my spring marathon and now have it narrowed down to 2 options - Lawrence, KS and Lincoln, NE. They are 2 weeks apart so depending on how my training goes these first 2 months will probably determine which one I'll do. Hopefully it'll be KS though. That's the earlier one so it'll give me more time in-between events so I don't suffer from burn-out like I did last season by scheduling things too close together. I'm not going to worry about my results during this spring marathon though. I know I won't be at my peak physical best so I can't expect to set a PR or anything. I'll just go out there to enjoy it and cross another state off the list. Hopefully, if I can find my working out mojo again, my fall marathon (IA) will test that PR.
I was talking today with someone about another resolution. Mainly hers, but it got me thinking about mine too, #3, and what I want out of it. There are definitely some different views out there about dating and what it's all about. I think I need to do some inner searching on who I'm looking for and how to go about finding her. It's not too hard to draw the conclusion that I haven't done it right yet considering I'm 41 and single.